Testimonials


Recovering Users Family/Friends

Below are real stories sent in by concerned Utah citizens.

If you have a story to share, please submit it through our Testimonials Form.




I started using meth when I was 18.  Right after I got married.  I hid it from him and most everyone else for two years.  Held down a job, paid my bills.  The last month I used, though, I spent our rent check on meth.  A little over 600 dollars.  It was gone in a week.  After that, I decided to clean up.  That was five years ago.  I now have a beautiful two-year-old daughter (born two years after I stopped using), hold down a steady job working as a crisis counselor at a drug rehab, helping people like myself, and am doing well.  With a few exceptions.  Even though I stopped using early on in our marriage, it took its toll, eventually.  I'm now separated, and looking at a divorce.  It took four years of trying to work through the trust issues that I'd created while I was using.  In the end, he decided that many of the things I'd done in the past simply weren't worth our future.  I don't blame him.  Not one bit.  In addition to that, my health is not good.  My kidneys and liver don't function properly and my teeth are continuing to crumble.  I am on anti-anxiety medication, am rarely able to sleep, and sometimes suffer from paranoid delusions. I have severe short-term memory loss and problems articulating.  All due to the damage my brain sustained while I was on meth.  It's not worth it.  Not at all.  Sometimes I look at my life and remember how I used to be.  Intelligent, articulate, healthy.  And I've done it all to myself.  I've lost my husband, a couple of jobs, a lot of money, my health, a degree of sanity, and a LOT of respect.  However, there was hope for me.  I've experienced more happiness while sober than I ever have when I was using.  Yes, I did destroy so much of my life, but, I survived and am trying to rebuild it. I've come a long way, and that's something to be proud of.  Many of my friends are newly recovering meth addicts (six months or less).  They were labeled "hopeless."  So was I, once.  But, there's no such thing.  Look at me.

Amber Bambrick, Salt Lake City - June 24, 2008
Hi, my name is Brett. I am an ex/recovering meth user. I am twenty-two years old and I have been clean now for eight months. I was recently incarcerated for my use and abuse of meth. I am married and have been married for almost three years. About 99% of that time I used and hid my meth use. I also have one son who is going on two years old and another on the way. Meth for me was a very bad escape from life and my problems. I am still going through substance abuse treatment and it is helping immensely. Yes, it is still hard, and it is still an every day battle not going back to my usual escape. I would have to say that right now the only thing that is truly helping me stay on track is my family. I almost lost them because of my use. My wife told me when I was in jail that "If you cannot stop, and you cannot find love for us deep within yourself, then I cannot be with you." That had to be the first time in the last few years that I truly opened my eyes and that was the first time I knew I was and always will be an addict. I started smoking meth when I was 13. I'm now 23 years old and have little to show for my time on this earth. What will it be like for you??? My family truly is and will always be my way out.
Brett Watkins, Logan - June 20, 2008

I began using meth tabs some 25 years ago while incarcerated, although my use of stimulants began five years earlier while with friends. My meth use took many avenues throughout my 30 year use. I was a dealer for many years and for several incarcerations. Nothing could or would stop my downward spiral into the meth death grip. I've lost friends to overdose, I've overdosed. I lost both parents while locked up. My health is failing drastically, yet finally at 43 years old a light came on. While sitting in a jail cell yet once again, I decided to stop using meth, as well as all controlled and non-prescribed medications. For 18 months now I am DRUG-free. Some say only 18 months. I say just two years ago I could not go 18 HOURS without my 32nd of an ounce shot of meth four times daily. That's about an eighth of an ounce myself daily, on an average of anywhere from $125 to $175.00 Just on the average of $150 a day, times THAT by a week's worth of use is $1,050, and a month is $4,200, then by a year is $50,400. I am not bragging nor am I proud of my use. I am clean now and will use everyday given to me to help someone else stay away from or off METH.

PLEASE, IF YOU'RE OUT THERE, GET HELP.  IF YOU'RE READING THIS THERE IS SOME SORT OF WANT IN YOU TO STOP. IT WILL KILL YOU, IT'S STILL KILLING ME AND I DON'T EVEN USE IT ANY LONGER. YOU SEE, I HAVE HEP C FROM USING NEEDLES.   GET HELP NOW.

Rocco Colantonio, South Ogden - May 27, 2008

One year seven months clean. Used for two years. I still cry when I think of my wonderful husband and two precious children. Thank Jesus I still have them. How in this world did I, me, G., suburban housewife, up on my pedestal, ever get caught up in that? I don't think anyone who ever asks themselves this will ever have a real answer. If you care enough to ask yourself then it was a place you never belonged anyway. A nightmare that you never fit into. A nightmare you couldn't or cannot feel or pick up your legs in. Ever had one of those? You just cannot...run away from that thing, which is chasing you. THE REALITY IS THAT YOU WILL WAKE UP AND YOU WILL BE ABLE TO FEEL AND RUN. And my advice is this: run as far and as fast as you can away from it and anyone who has a part in it. Plain and simple. Believe it or not. You've isolated yourself from everything that really matters anyway. You've hurt the ones you really care about (although you've made yourself believe you care for your circle of users). You've hurt yourself.  Let 'em have it for now. You can help them after you help yourself.

G Moore, - May 27, 2008

I have about 3 1/2 years clean from meth. I know firsthand how addictive and out of control this stuff can be. I never imagined in a million years I could find the strength to live meth free, but I did. I know it sounds cliche, but I truly believe IF I CAN DO IT ANYONE CAN. You have to cut people out of your life for good who are still using and you have to change your atmosphere to a positive one. I know it can be hard to turn your back on friends who are still using, but in order to stay clean you must make a lot of changes, and believe me, IT IS POSSIBLE TO BE CLEAN!!!!!!!! YOU CAN DO IT!!!! STAY FOCUSED AND POSITIVE AND NEVER GIVE UP!!!

Patricia Faye, Ventura, CA - May 15, 2008

I started using Meth about a year and a half ago. Before using meth I was a very active parent, enjoyed my family and helping others. I had a very good job working for the State of Utah as an eligibility specialist. Within that year and a half I lost my job where I had been employed for 7 years. I lost my car, I served 17 days in jail, and now I am facing federal prison. This drug has destroyed my life, my family, and I have lost everything but the hope that I can somehow save someone else by trying to educate them. Thank God my family has been very supportive because I don't know where I would be without them. They just wish that they would have known the signs of my addiction in hopes that they could have somehow prevented some of the choices I made. I have been clean now for 36 days. I feel great, better than I have in a very long time. I take things day by day and I would love to help our community in any way I can to help in the fight to END METH NOW...

Laura Bustamante, Taylorsville - May 14, 2008
My former fiance was a meth user. I was always so against drugs, and NEVER wanted to be around or try them. My fiance and I started arguing one day and I asked him to choose me or the drugs. He chose the drugs. So then that led me to want to try it, to see why he would give up our perfect relationship for a temporary high.
 
continue reading Kristyna's story
Kristyna SMith, - May 08, 2008
I have been clean for a little over ten years now. Meth took my wife, my kids, and my livelihood and it almost took my life several times. I wish there had been a program like this when I was using. I use to think that my life was hopeless and that I would never amount to anything. You can't beat this alone you need help. I went to rehab and found out that there are a lot of people like me, with the same kind of stories and the same problems and the helped me a lot. It's never too late to straighten out your life.
Jeremy Horne, Kearns - April 30, 2008
I have been clean from meth for about 32 months now.  I started using very heavily when I was 12.  I started using heroin at 15 and just decided I could not stop using meth and went back to it a year later.  I lost my innocence, my self respect, everything about myself.  I was at an age where I was supposed to be figuring out who I am, not killing myself.  I got pregnant at age 20 and decided that I could kill myself, but I was not going to also kill my child with my addiction.  I entered myself into a program called Odyssey House and spent 30 months there struggling to figure out who I am and fighting for my life.  I now have two wonderful jobs, and a very beautiful and priceless two-year-old.  I could not imagine my life without him and meth almost took that away from me.  It was the hardest decision I have ever made, but also the most rewarding one.  I would not change my life at all. I would not change the eight years I was high. I learned a lot in those eight years of my life and am using that for good now to help others.
Lauren Doane, Salt Lake City - April 17, 2008

I am a small business owner in Salina, Utah. I have been meth-free now for more than seven years. I lived in Nevada with my young son and to get through the day meth was my savior at that time. I know the devastating effects meth has on families; meth ruled my life and the lives of those who I associated with. I stole from my place of work so I could buy more meth, I bounced checks, I did not pay my rent and in all I was in jail more often than not, a total of nine times for misdemeanor offenses that normally I would never do. I woke up one day and said to myself "I don't like where my life is heading." I packed up my things and left. I have been drug-free ever since. To me, the only way to get off of meth was to leave everything and everyone associated with it behind me. I am now a proud business owner and I fight every day to help fight this horrible addiction. I want to associate my store with your program in the hopes that maybe they will know that I am here for them, every step of the way. End Meth Now is a great service and one which is overdue. Thanks so much!

Alan Hatch, Salina - March 26, 2008

First off, I would like to congratulate all involved with this site...kudos. I am a recovering 37 year old male who has been clean for over five years. My life was full of promise as I entered into the I.T. field... I had it all, FAMILY, FRIENDS, a FUTURE. I started "partying" on the weekend's w/meth... snorting it at first, and then finally smoking it. The quality of life I had worked so hard to achieve was dissolving before my eyes... slowly at first, then finally erupting into a downward spiral that I couldn't see. It got so bad that I was losing my family. I lost my job (again) and I used more and more until I lost it all. My mind was not my own anymore, twisted and self-serving. So I robbed a casino and spent three years of my life in prison. It was during that time that I entered into the O.A.S.I.S (Offenders Acting in Solidarity to Insure Sobriety) program within the prison system. I have learned so much about myself and addiction and I am eternally grateful for being incarcerated: It saved my life. I now have a great job, a wonderful family and regained my self respect. In short, I appreciate what all of you are trying so hard to desperately do: end the epidemic caused by METH. Treatment is the key. PERIOD.

Kirk Hall, - February 26, 2008
My advice to those of you who are still suffering is to get into a program and work it faithfully. Be as honest as you can be. You have to want the help in order for it to work for you. If I can come from where I have been, I know other addicts can better their lives as well. Giving back has helped me the most. I am very open about my addiction because I hope that I can help at least one other addict by giving them hope that recovery is possible.

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Christy, Salt Lake City - January 14, 2008
I want to write and say "Thank You" for the continuing effort to heal our community.  I am a recovering meth addict and cleaning up my life has been amazing.  Thank you for the ads I hear on the radio, TV, and on the Internet.  They remind me where I've been, where I'm going and where I want to be.  I am committed to a clean, productive, healthy life.  It's hard for me to accept that I contributed to something that destroys so much. I am committed to sharing my story, helping others, and doing everything I can to aid in the elimination of this epidemic and the healing of our community.  Thanks again.
Jordan, Utah - December 10, 2007

I was a heavy meth user for 2 years and ended up losing everything, including my 4 kids. I have had to work very hard and go through a lot to get clean and I will be getting my kids back next month. I ended up in jail because of a situation I put myself in while using meth and will be 10 months clean on November 5. I want to help anyone who needs or wants it. Any suggestions or if you know a way I can do that, please let me know.
Nicole, Utah County - November 28, 2007

I am an addict. Although I am almost 4 years clean (Feb. 1; pat on the back) I am still an addict. I have a family and a husband. Meth is truly an evil substance. I hope your attempts to make this problem less problematic is not futile. I myself struggled for many years and my husband had also. We hurt countless family members and ourselves. Yes you are correct that it is widely spread among women and as mother's this is very frightening. But my husband used after we quit and it became quite a strain on our loving household. He lied about where he worked, what he did, everything. If it was not for our fantastic relationship that we did truly have, I would have said goodbye. Knowing is so important. Meth is truly not something to be reckoned with.  I want all communities to know the signs of use by all genders, what to do if they feel their loved one is using, and how to love their loved one that is under the influence. Thank you for building this campaign. This is a very emotional subject for myself and I hope addicts can get help and make a better life for themselves. There is hope and a way out. You don't have to be stuck.
Anonymous, - October 07, 2007
I am a recovering Meth addict. I lived on the streets of Salt Lake City and almost lost my life several times. I have had 7 wonderful years of a clean life now, and it is my dream to help others. If it weren't for my family, I would be dead or in prison, the two options left when you are addicted.
Marcie, Pleasant Grove - October 04, 2007